Clear and bright…
September 7, 2008 | My Joys
If ever a child has grown into the meaning of her name, it’s Clara.
All the baby name books say that Clara means “clear and bright”, and here are some of the definitions of those words from Merriam-Webster: Clear: luminous, cloudless, serene, transparent, unmistakable, keen, innocent, pure. Bright: shining, sunny, lively, cheerful, intelligent, promising.
She is my oldest grandchild, firstborn of our daughter Carolyn and her husband Jeremy. Clara is six years old and is in the first grade. She loves to read (“Grandma, I guess you could say I’m a bookworm!”) and she’s very content to spend hours drawing, creating and imagining. While she was at our house yesterday, she read Charlotte’s Web, made an 18-inch tall weather vane out of felt, construction paper, tape and pipe cleaner (making sure I knew which were the North/South/West/East arrows), built a small room out of Legos with an “emergency exit window”, demonstrated the difference between the calls of the chickadees and nuthatches at our deck feeder, and told me she loved me about seven times.
One of the things I love most about Clara is her very real devotion for her three younger siblings. She and her brother Elijah are sixteen months apart and are true friends. There is a deep bond between them and it’s beautiful to see. She thinks the antics of her little sister Vivienne are adorable and says, “Grandma, isn’t Vivie so sweet?” And Clara is genuinely delighted when baby Audrey smiles or accomplishes something for the first time (“Grandma, Audrey can crawl and sit up now!”).
I grew up loving books, and remember the first time that excitement for reading began in me: in the second grade at Workman Avenue Elementary School in West Covina, when my teacher Mrs. Lokken read aloud the Mrs. Piggle-Wiggle books to our class. We would sit resting with our heads down on our desks after a hard-playing recess in furnace-like Southern California weather. I remember thinking that I was going to read those books to my children when I became a mother someday. And I did. What never entered my seven year-old mind was that I might eventually be a grandmother as well, and perhaps I would read them to my grandchildren.
So when the children’s play “The Magic Mrs. Piggle-Wiggle” came to The Children’s Theater in Minneapolis earlier this year, we began a tradition that I hope to continue for many years: a Grandma Date. Clara and I drove to the Twin Cities and saw the wonderful production, stayed at a nice hotel, ate at restaurants, and made some memories. Elijah knows that next year when he is six, he and I will do the same together.
Clara is tall and long-legged, has golden hair and skin, and expressive blue eyes. She can be shy around new people, but her conversation with those she’s comfortable with is constant, full of hypothesizing and frequent words of love. She is obedient to her parents, helpful and peaceful. She’s an amazing example for her younger brother and sisters.
Clara loves to watch reruns of The Lawrence Welk Show on Saturday nights. When she happens to be spending the night at Grandpa and Grandma’s on a Saturday, she’ll often look at me with wide eyes and say, “Grandma! Remember what’s on TV tonight!” And when I say, “Lawrence Welk?”, she smiles and nods emphatically, knowing in a little while we’ll be watching together, swaying to Guy and Ralna or Bobby and Cissy doing their thing.
She likes to hear about life “back in the old days” when I was a child, or about poignant memories I have of her when she was younger. Recently she asked me to tell her some things I remembered about her when she was a baby. One vivid memory came to mind. I told her that when she was about a year old, we had a high chair in our kitchen that we used just for her visits. I told her how she would sit in this high chair and tentatively try some of the new finger foods her mama gave her. Even at a year old, Clara was watchful and quiet, and as I moved around the kitchen her eyes followed me, and when I spoke to her in Grandma-like coos and smiled at her, she grinned back hugely, breaking my heart into pieces. I told Clara that as long as I was in the room, she was content. But if I left the kitchen and moved out of her eyesight, she would burst into tears. After hearing all of this, six-year old Clara looked into my eyes and placed her hand on mine and said, “Grandma, it’s still pretty much like that now.”
There are days now when life seems a little overwhelming to me. Years ago I couldn’t have looked in my mind to the horizon of our future and seen there the things that make up our life now. We have things I never thought we’d have, and are missing things I never thought would be lost. Sometimes it feels like we are muddling around in the dark, trying hard to hold on to our Savior’s hand. Theologically, I know that He is holding us in His hands, but I forget that much too often. How thankful I am for our grandchildren and the riches and perspective they bring to our lives. They cause us to lift our chins, roll up our sleeves and set our hearts and minds on what’s truly important. They help us to pray and to dream and to hope.
My oldest grandchild Clara brings me joy. She is just plain good company. Her very presence can make things seem clearer and brighter, although at age six she has no idea that she exemplifies the meaning of her name. It is my prayer that as she grows, she will learn to walk closely with the Lord and that she will look to Jesus as the Protector of her heart.
I’m so proud and thankful to share about my granddaughter Clara. I love her so.
Lana
September 5, 2008 | My Joys
You see her enter a massive room full of dozens of tables and hundreds of chairs, and you are immediately struck by her gorgeous auburn hair, cut very stylishly. Next you notice how perfectly dressed she is, and you realize she knows what colors a redhead looks good in. You watch as she (and possibly an assistant or two) methodically but creatively transform the plain room into an enchanting place that will hold a wedding reception that fulfills a young bride’s dreams. You note how efficient and particular this beautiful woman is as she expertly drapes each seat with a shimmery white fabric chair cover that she designed and made herself, and ties it off with a fancy, elegant bow for a final flourish. A once nondescript room is now something that would evoke “ooohs” or “aaahs” from anyone entering, and would quickly draw them in.
I want you to meet Lana. Really, what Lana does with her started-from-scratch chair cover business is very similar to what she does in her life. She does it with her family, her home, and her friends. This creative and generous woman can take the ordinary, and quite simply, make it better. She brings a sense of refreshment with her wherever she goes.
A little over two years ago, Lana introduced herself to me at our Tuesday Community Bible Study and lovingly told me she would pray for my husband, who had been recently diagnosed with Parkinson’s Disease. Last year she became a core leader at CBS and our friendship really took off. Lana is one of those rare women who is immediately so easy to be with, to converse with, to get to know, that she has made me feel like we’ve been friends for decades instead of a relatively short couple of years. Everyone who calls Lana friend knows her attentive, compassionate way of listening. She has a tender heart that translates into everything she does. When I need comfort and a good dose of encouragement, she’s one of the first people I think of.
Lana is a prayerful, devoted wife, and mom to three grown and fabulously talented children, yet she prays for my husband and children. Her faith in Jesus permeates her life in a humble and attractive manner. She’s a great decorator who brings peace and harmony to her home, not only with her creativity, but with her personality. She helped paint my newly remodeled kitchen and offered her service to us many other times. A year ago she heard that we had an undetected leak in a kitchen pipe which ruined floors, and she showed up at our door with a delicious dinner, to lighten my load. She’s just there, with a smile and a prayer and a soft way about her that really does make me feel better.
Lana is a true mixture of elegance and grace. Like the transformation that occurs when she works her magic on ordinary, utilitarian chairs, she probably doesn’t even realize she does the same with the people in her life. She quietly changes any atmosphere into something a little more beautiful, a little softer and more inviting, with her gentle, sincerely compassionate ways.
She is a woman of many friends, yet she takes time to regularly communicate with me. I am thankful for the richness and love Lana has brought into my life. I count her friendship among my most cherished blessings.
Meet Lana.
What does September mean to you?
September 4, 2008 | My Jottings
1. Golden light coming in our windows.
2. Seeing if we can wait until October 1st to turn the furnace on.
3. Leaf color that rivals New England.
4. My son-in-law’s birthday and my friend’s birthday and my birthday.
5. Back to Community Bible Study – yay.
6. More energy.
7. Oven on, more baking, good kitchen smells.
8. Getting up in the dark each morning.
9. Pots of homemade soup.
10. Turtlenecks and blazers.
Okay, now I want to hear from you. What are ten things or five things or even three things that September brings to your life?
Helping me hope
September 1, 2008 | My Jottings
The Big Picture
August 26, 2008 | My Jottings
This is what’s turning around and around in my mind this morning: The Big Picture. More specifically, The Big Picture of Life.
I am not a Big Picture person. I am a detail person. I would never contribute much to a committee established to bring visionary leadership to any group or company. I’m the person they would hire if they wanted their files straight, their pencils in one cup and their pens in another, and their teaspoons all nesting perfectly together. If someone wanted their towels folded first in halves, then in thirds and piled in a visually appealing way, their checkbook ledgers reconciled with their monthly statements to the penny, and their keys always at hand, then I am their gal. I have noticed that no one is lined up at my door clamoring to enlist my services, although I do think my husband appreciates the order now and then.
But I usually lose sight of The Big Picture. Detail people can do that easily. This morning I remembered that in relationships, especially in marriage, details are very important, but The Big Picture should be always on the front burners of the mind and heart.
I read an interview several months ago that jarred my thinking, and I thought of it this morning. A fairly well-known Christian singer was talking about marriage and how difficult it can be, with two people bringing to the mix their different pieces of baggage, their patterns, their expectations, their weaknesses. She said that in her marriage, especially when she and her husband disagree or experience tension, she asks herself (and then answers) this question: “What is the ultimate goal here? The ultimate goal isn’t to win the fight, it’s to build a life together.”
People who love details usually love to be right. But today as I consider The Big Picture, I am reminded that our ultimate goal is to build a life together. It’s not so important being right. It’s more important to be loving. This is a challenging lesson for me, because my default mode is not love, it’s truth. Learning to speak and work and glance and touch and listen in love, in love, is like driving on the left side of the road for me, in a car with the steering wheel on the right side and the stick shift at my left hand. I tried this in Great Britain a couple of years ago. It can be done, but it takes intense concentration and determination, and God’s help.
So today I’m thinking about The Big Picture. What do I want things to look like in five years? In twenty-five years? When I peer ahead in my imagination to try to envision what kind of life we might have, files and towels don’t come to mind. At all. One thing that comes to mind is a DVD mini-series I just watched – a gift from my daughter Sharon for Mother’s Day. It’s called John Adams and is about the second President of the United States. It’s beautifully done and so worth watching.
Apparently John and Abigail Adams had a very devoted, honest, loving and intensely loyal relationship. In their letters to each other and often in person, they called each other “My dearest friend”. The tenderness with which they regarded each other was so moving, and even into old age they seemed to both know that the other was their greatest treasure.
One doesn’t reach a marital place like this without keeping The Big Picture in mind. Details are important, but “what is the ultimate goal here?…it’s to build a life together.” Today I am very keenly aware of what kind of building I want to do. I need God’s help to do it, but with God, all things are possible. (Matt. 19:26)
Indentured Schnauzitude
August 23, 2008 | My Jottings
Old and young. Calm and anxious. Intelligent and not-much-upstairs. Long-suffering and impatient. Wiry and curly. Dark and light. Tolerant and instigating. Endearing and annoying. Edith and Mildred. (Edith Elaine Bubbleloo and Mildred Virginia Sizzlelorum, but their full names will be addressed in another post).
These are our Miniature German Schnauzers. Edith is on the left and she’s six years old, and Mildred “Millie” is two. Other than their size, breed and slaves owners, they have very little in common.
Edith is the quintessential Schnauzer: alert, affectionate, bright, and devoted to her people. Millie was born in Nebraska, so maybe that has something to do with her aberrant ways. She needs The Dog Whisperer in the worst way. She, too, has many of the Schnauzer traits, but we’re still waiting for her to grow out of her puppy stage. She pees on the floor when new people say her name, she enjoys shredding pre-driven Kleenex with her teeth, she inhales her food and then greedily lurks behind Edith as she’s slowly savoring hers, and she tries to get Edith to wrestle about every twenty minutes or so. Edith endures it like a martyr, looking at us resigned and sighing, “See what I go through for you?”
Our dogs sit on our furniture, watch our television (a photo of that will be coming in another post), occupy the greatest space on our bed, demonstrate several times a day how efficient their digestive systems are, and pretty much run our lives. It’s called Indentured Schnauzitude. We signed up for it, and the contract reads something like this: “In exchange for the best of food, a large, comfortable human bed and several overstuffed chairs, regular vet visits, expensive minty Booda Bone chews, quarterly grooming, unlimited wildlife in the yard for loud yipping and shrieking practice, and an abundance of ear-scratching and Teletubbies viewing, Edith and Millie agree to live with the slaves Michael and Julie.” Maybe we should have procured legal counsel before we signed on the dotted line?
We sure love these little dooginses, though. Dogs can really make your lives happy.
Diane
August 22, 2008 | My Joys
Let me introduce you to Diane. 
We met in the early part of 1977 when we were both very pregnant and taking childbirth education classes with our husbands. Our friendship was thus conceived at the celebrated and distinguished Yuba College in Yuba City, CA, birthed at Beale AFB in Marysville, nurtured in Germany, and has grown and flourished through decades of letters, visits and talks on the phone.
Diane has had adventures many of us only dream about. She has traveled the world, and lived in a good portion of it: Guam, Korea, The Azores Islands, Germany, and yes, even Louisiana. She’s a native Southern Californian, as I am, and even though she’s thinking toward retirement, she exudes optimism and youth and resilience, and she knows how to make a new beginning when one is called for.
This woman can write. You and I will see her name on book covers someday. She is a sensitive poet and has published many pieces. She’s working on a novel that will cause me to someday say proudly, “I knew her when….” Much of our friendship has been conducted through the written word, long before electronic mail, and on the days I found a thick letter from Diane with that familiar tiny handwriting in my mailbox, I would return inside my house and plop down on the couch, anxious to savor what she wrote. I still have most of her letters.
In 1988, after moving to an island off the coast of Portugal, she described their house to me: “We live in a 200-year old house which used to be a convent. It is by far the most interesting (although possibly the least comfortable!) home we’ve ever had, although we are taking steps to make it more homey. It’s large and stark, as befits a convent, with high ceilings, thick wooden doors and shutters (which we close at night to keep out the howling wind) – and it’s made of whitewashed volcanic rock. We have 4 bedrooms, a big kitchen/dining room, a small frontroom and bathroom, and a long, spooky hall.” Can you see why I wanted to hop on a plane at once and go right to where she was? I wanted to hear and feel that howling wind off the Atlantic, I wanted to tiptoe down that spooky hall and hear those ancient doors creak. And I wanted to sit and have coffee with Diane so we could talk and laugh and connect. I still do.
Diane has three remarkable grown children. She was an effective and well-loved high school teacher. She still teaches at the college level. She paints. She travels. She does unexpected and adventurous things like purchase wild, untamed land in Alaska on which to someday build a cabin, and considers up and moving to different states where she might have a new start, a desert climate and a writing casita.
Generous. That’s what Diane is. Generous with her encouragement and words of cheer. Generous with the way she listens, gets acquainted with people, and imparts comfort and hope into their lives. She’s a woman so generous, even lavish with patience and goodwill toward others.
She came into my life bearing a gift – she knocked on my front door at Beale AFB and handed me a lovely wrapped present for my newborn daughter. She continues to give so much to me all these years later, and I honestly can’t imagine my life without her.
Meet Diane.
Susan
August 20, 2008 | My Joys
Let me introduce you to Susan.
I met Susan when she and her husband Dale moved next door to us over ten years ago. We became friends quickly and often had tea and Pillsbury Orange Rolls together at each others’ tables. She gave me some of the best recipes I’ve ever had and still use, such as Athenian Couscous Salad.
We talked about books, God, marriage, children, about not going home again, aging parents, dogs, and the joys and sadness of life. She is a brilliant woman – a geologist by profession who knows her asbestos! – but she is also one of the most kind and humble people I’ve ever met. You would never know by just visiting with her that she could probably demolish you in Jeopardy; instead you would immediately feel that she could be a soft place to land and a person you could implicitly trust.
She loves all things Egyptian. She is so honest and allowed me to know her, and wanted to know me. A little bit shy by nature, she stepped out of her comfort zone and dressed as a clown for my birthday one year (along with many other clown friends). “See how much I love you?” she smiled. And I was so touched.
She found out I had a hubcap obsession and gave me old hubcabs planted with flowers. She and her husband Dale asked my husband Michael and me to sponsor their children Will and Zoe when they were baptized, and we will never forget the sacred glow of those days. We used to wave at each other through our windows. We used to eat Vietnamese food together on New Year’s Eve.
Susan and her family eventually moved to the southern part of our state and we now have to rely on occasional phone calls and e-mails. I hope we can visit in person before too many years fly by. She
will always be one of my most cherished friends, and I never eat an orange roll anymore without feeling like I’m betraying our friendship in some way.
Meet Susan. To know her is a great gift.
Old friends and new…
August 19, 2008 | My Jottings
“A friend is someone who knows the song in your heart and can sing it back to you when you have forgotten the words.” Unknown
I love this quote and find it so true in my own life.
Aside from a place where I can share my goofy observations and serious contemplations, I am excited to share about my friends on this blog. God has used each of my friends to impact my life in ways that no one else could. Some of my friends have spoken much needed truth to me. Some have been so patient with me when it would have been easier to wring my neck. Some have faithfully cheered me up in very melancholy times. Some of my friends have given to me and served our family in amazingly generous ways. But every friend I’ve been blessed with has, in their own way, “known the song in my heart and sung it back to me when I’ve forgotten the words.”
I have never wanted my friends to be exclusively mine. I love them so much I want others to know and love them too. So over the next several weeks I’m going to introduce some of my friends to you, and share a little about how they’ve all enriched my life.
You can read about my friends in the My Joys section of this site. And if any of you are so inclined, I’d love to hear about one special thing a friend has done for you.
Do you have a life verse?
August 18, 2008 | My Jottings
My life verse is Job 23:12.
I have not departed from the commands of His lips;
I have treasured the words of His mouth more than my daily bread. (NIV)
A life verse is a verse or passage from the Bible that is very significant for you. Some people choose a life verse because it was that scripture that cut through the darkness and revealed to them their need for Christ. Some choose a particular verse for the hope and encouragement it speaks into their specific circumstances. Another may feel a certain passage truly sums up what God has done in her life. And then there are people who choose a life verse because that’s what they hope to see become a reality in their lives, through God’s love and power. This is why Job 23:12 is a verse I’ve memorized and have clung to for years now. It isn’t a full reality in my life yet. But I want to someday be able to look back at my life and point to Jesus and say with confidence, “Through His mercy and constant care and enabling patience, I have not turned away from His ways; He has caused me to truly love the brilliance and wonder of His Word more than even the food I crave every day.”
Some days my life verse is a concrete reality for me. When I sit in my chair in the mornings and ask God to speak into my dry and needy life as I open His Word, the ways in which He often does that are so personal and amazing that I cry and marvel all at once.
Other days I sadly feel that I have treasured my daily bread more than the words of His mouth. So I would say that God is beckoning me to allow this verse to become a scripture that accurately sums up my life. Does it now? No. But will it someday? I sincerely pray that it will.
Do you have a special verse or passage in the Bible that is significant to you? If you are a Christian and don’t have a “life verse”, I encourage you to ask God to give you one. Ask Him to show you in the way that only He can, what scripture He wants to bring to completion in your life. Then perhaps you could memorize that verse, post it in various places in your house, to help you keep it in the forefront of your mind, and begin to rehearse it over and over. Whatever we most rehearse in our minds is what we will end up believing, and what we believe is what we live. I want my rehearsals, my beliefs and my living to be a little different these days.
One of the hardest things about walking with Jesus in our culture is turning down the volume of the world enough to hear His whispers. When I’m up and running in the morning, getting medications and lunches and laundry going for our foster care gals, it seems so hectic that even before an hour has passed I feel weary. But if I will carefully tune my ear to Him, I can sometimes hear Him whisper. I live for those times.
If you read this post, will you share what your life verse is with me? You don’t have to post it as a comment if you don’t want to, but it might be encouraging to someone else if you do. E-mail if you prefer. But wouldn’t it be wonderful if He whispered something personal to you from His Word, something that was on His heart about you and the days He has numbered for you?
Learning to listen,

